I passed my defense...and then lots of other stuff happened

February 12 -
So, I passed the defense of my specialized portfolio! Woo hoo! Which means I can continue in the program and write my dissertation proposal (and then defend that) and then my dissertation (and defend that too). It was actually an enjoyable hour and a half, lots of gems of insight - things I had not thought of - and some praise too - which I really wasn't expecting. I even got a glowing email of praise from my advisor the following Monday. I printed it and it went in my "Read this when you need to feel better about yourself professionally" file.

Six hours later, Scott and I celebrated by going out to dinner and then settling in to watch the opening ceremonies of the Olympics - then the phone rang. Scott's Dad, Wayne, fell on the ice. We rushed over to his place and then raced him to the ER - 3 hours later - fractured right ankle. Must stay off of it for at least 6 weeks. We leave his place once we get him settled in bed and come home around midnight to find our cat, Ares, had gotten sick.

We figured Ares just had a hairball, until he sleeps with us the entire night and doesn't get off the bed once.

February 13 -
Nine A.M. finds me rushing Ares to the vet and Scott going to his Dad's. I have to leave Ares at the vet's while they run all sorts of tests and give him fluids because he was dehydrated. Around 12:30 I call them to get an update - kidneys are fine (whew). 1:30 they call back and let me know they found a kidney stone and he has a urinary tract infection. Antibiotics for a week - bring him back the next weekend.

Ares gets home and is running around like a wild man, meanwhile his excess skin is hanging even lower on his belly because of the fluids - and is kind of giving him a bingo wing effect -or maybe a flying squirrel would be more accurate.

Finally relax (after going over to Wayne's) - and I remember - Oh yeah, I passed!

February 14-17
Taking care of Wayne, trying to write protocol questions (get five more completed and all organized), assistantship stuff, I think I did other stuff but everything is kind of fuzzy now. Small disagreement with Scott, and then one with Wayne so I left and went to the grocery store. And oh yeah, I passed!

February 18
Take Wayne to the orthopedic surgeon, still slightly irked with him but not as much, Scott and I are cool. Surgeon says surgery is needed (pins and plates) but not a good idea with Wayne's age (79) and health (not so great). Cast (not a walking cast), wants us to come back the following week to re-evaluate (i.e. hasn't completely ruled out the idea of surgery, but will more than likely have to recast) The current cast is blue, if he has to recast I want pink - but Wayne wouldn't go for that. And oh yeah, I passed!

February 19
See February 14-17 minus the disagreements, but beginning of the wheel chair saga.

February 20
Take Ares back to the vet. Still blood and bacteria in his urine - most likely urinary tract disorder. The doc ordered another two weeks of antibiotics and special cat food. (I have to have a prescription card for this food and cannot purchase it until I show it at the checkout...my cat has a prescription card). I determine it is a good thing I love my kitty so very much to spend $700 on him in one week. But he loves his new cat food and they don't need to see him for two weeks this time. Oh yeah, still taking care of Wayne. By now it finally sunk in I've passed - but now I realize - yikes - I have a LOT of work to do.

February 21-23
Taking care of Wayne, trying to stay on my diet plan, but really craving peanut butter. Graduate assistantship stuff gets crazy, two irritating students - and still no further on my dissertation proposal or protocol questions.

February 24
That brings us to today. I'm not sleeping well do to the added tension of, well, my life. Although I think that watching Dexter (season 3) before bed might have something to do with that - mostly now that my schedule has completely changed because of a) Wayne, and b) problems at work - I'm trying to just keep it together physically and mentally. I think because I didn't have time for it to sink in that I passed, and get to celebrate that fact, everything feels a lot more overwhelming at the moment. I didn't have the chance to decompress before everything started back up again - so now the small things that didn't irritate me are becoming gigantic issues. I've gone back to the mentally beating myself up because I haven't accomplished what I thought I should by this point, or that I put a couple of pounds on rather than taking them off. Old habits die hard!!! And it is taking a lot for me to remember that I'm not Wonder Woman (even though at the age of 5 I was convinced I was for about 3 weeks). I'm just going to keep getting through the days - do what I can - and spring break is just one week from Monday. I'll take spring break to lay out the rest of my proposal and take myself to a couple of movies. And on a completely different note, I recently purchased an ergonomic keyboard, and while typing this entry I realized that I only ever hit the space button with my left hand and if I try to hit it with my right, I have to stop and think about it. Weird.