School and Shoes

I got an assistantship for the school year!!!! This is good news, school will be paid for and I will have a job I will enjoy that I only have to work 20 hours per week and make the same amount of money as I did when I was temping for 40 hours per week. So one less thing to have to think about. Now I can go on my excursions this month and not have to worry about finding a job at the same time.

Since I started working in the corporate world, my shoe style has changed. I no longer had to be on my feet for 8 hours a day so I started wearing high heels again. Now, I like wearing heels whenever I get the chance. So needless to say two of my three outfits for my reunion will have a high heel of some type. (The outfit for the picnic will have a wedge rather than a traditional heel because we'll be on grass). Scott and I usually avoid the mall at all costs, but Friday night found us there waiting for our movie and thus I found my self in a shoe store.

Take a look at this shoe.




It isn't sensible by any stretch of the imagination. The heel is really high, but I can successfully walk in them without looking like a dork. They make my ankles look sexy. And to top it off I only paid $26 for them. Lots of reasons to keep them, lots of reasons to take them back. On Friday night, I decided to take them back almost immediately after I got them. But then I took them home and put them with the outfit I'm wearing and I decided to keep them. By Sunday night, after not having looked at them for two days, I decided to take them back again. But after trying them on again Monday morning and taking these pictures, I decided to keep them. So what do I do when I'm in a quandary about shoes, ask my mother who is very sensible in the matters. She said take them back that they aren't practical...then she saw the pictures and called me to tell me to keep them and that she'll pay for them because they are too cute not to have in my shoe collection.


So now that I'm adding another pair of shoes to my closet, I've decided to get rid of two pairs that I never wear anymore. I think that is a pretty good trade, don't you?

Drama Queen, who me?

I don't think I'm a fanciful person. Am I drama queen? Depends on the connotation of that phrase. In the good sense - yes - I am a passionate person and I experience emotions, I don't suppress them. In the bad sense - I should think not! I don't create drama, I don't meddle in people's business, I do on occasion overreact - but usually those are for very short periods of time...I digress.

My dad-by-marriage called tonight - he never calls me - so needless to say I was slightly alarmed. He begins the conversation, "Don't be alarmed, but your mom is in the hospital." (Sentences with buts, never end well for me...I have a whole history of bad news brought to me by a variation of those very words and each and every time the news takes me to the very place the person saying those words didn't want me to go.) It's my mom, she's never sick, of course I'm slightly alarmed. It's gallstones, there will be some more tests tomorrow to determine if she will be having surgery. I'm worried. I know I'd feel better if I was geographically closer to her. Then I could see her and I'd stop imagining the worst. But I don't panic, instead I call my love at work. I figured if I hear his voice, I won't freak out.

So I call him, and he can detect the verge of panic in my voice - well that and I say, "I'm scared." He assures me she's fine and I say I know this but I'm still scared. In retrospect, it is one of those Mars and Venus things going on in the conversation. (OMG I just used that term...anyway) I was calling to hear - in a calming voice - something along the lines of, "Don't worry honey, everything will be alright, I'll be home soon and I'll give you lots of hugs and kisses to reassure you that all is right with the world." (But of course much more eloquently.) I hear instead that I must realize that my mother isn't getting any younger and people's bodies start to fall apart and that it will probably be happening to him in a decade or so, and its a part of life and that I shouldn't be a drama queen. (This isn't a direct quote, I'm paraphrasing, note the lack of quotation marks around the sentence.) Essentially its the same thing, in his male loveable way he was trying to use reason to get me to see the logic of the situation, in order to keep me calm and not to worry about a situation I can't do anything about. It does make sense. But emotions don't make sense and sometimes you have to experience the emotion before you can see the "reality" of the situation.

I need to go through a little bit of panic, that initial shock. It is someone I love dearly and she's sick and I can't be with her - of course I'm going to worry and be alarmed. I need to have those 5-10 minutes, then I'll look at it differently. If the panic lasted longer than that, by all means - give me a dose of "reality" - My friends in college were quite good at those, I still think Margaret's responses are still my favorite - "Knock it off " which was usually followed by an elbow to the boob or her "angry" face and a threat to be kicked in the knee caps. Ah, fond memories...I digress again.

Well, when my love gets home I think I'll give him a hug call him, a big poo-poo head and turn in for the night. Blogging seems to have taken the, so called "drama queen" out of me for the evening.