Envelopes, Budgets, Chocolate and Anxiety

I am very proud to announce that I have not used a credit card in two months! As intended, I went to the Consumer Credit Counseling Services of Northwest Ohio and enrolled in the debt management plan and all of the credit card companies have accepted the terms. By May 14, 2014 I will be debt free (credit card debt - student loans - that is a different matter completely). I was only paying the minimum payments, and at that rate I would never get out of debt - now I pay half of what I did. I'll be saving $12,000 in interest by the time I pay off the last card in 2014.

I also went to the Student Money Management Services on campus and got help setting up a budget/system to keep track of my spending. A lovely woman name Patricia introduced me to a yearly excel spread sheet, that for my little brain seems to be working pretty well. I've also implemented the envelope system. I have an envelope for each day of the week and at the end of each day I put the receipts in the day's envelope. And each week, I take my cup of coffee, turn on some tunes and go through my receipts and update my spending plan and budget. Until I started tracking some of my expenditures, I never realized how much money I was spending on coffee. Yes, that is right - I have a coffee habit. I used to get Starbucks 6 days a week, most of the time it was just coffee, but often times I'd have a cap or a frap or some other drink - and the price really added up. Now, I've cut back to 3-4 times a week, during the work week - I only get a grande coffee and in my Starbucks travel mug (save $.10 per cup), and one fancy coffee drink on the weekends. Also during the week I can only by my coffee with change I have with me - so no cash, no coffee. So the whole spending plan and budgeting thing is really paying off so far.

I passed another milestone in my weight loss 73.2 lbs. I have 19.6 lbs. until my goal - 150 lbs. That might sound heavy, but to me that is skinny, especially when at my heaviest I was 250lbs. To date I have gone from a size 20-22 to a size 9-10. I can fit into an 8, but won't wear it out in public yet. I know that I've lost weight - really I get it - people don't recognize me sometimes (which I find weird, but that is beside the point) - but I still feel like I'm a fat woman. I spent so much time overweight that it is difficult to accept that I'm average size now. I've also developed another odd bit of paranoia - I feel (and I KNOW this is ridiculous) like people are watching what I eat and just waiting for me to put all the weight back on. And don't even get me started in shopping for clothes - I went and picked up an eight at Old Navy, and was sure that everyone around me was thinking, "Who does that fatso think she's fooling by buying an 8!" So needless to say I have some mental adjustments to make as I embrace this new body.

As of two hours ago, I got back on a regular exercise routine. I did my Wii Fit for the first time in 543 days, as it so lovingly pointed out. It was cool my Mii doesn't look like a bowling ball with legs anymore, however the thing still says I'm overweight. And I must admit, I was not too happy with the couch potato comment when I wasn't balancing well during one Yoga pose. It will take some adjusting, I was used to carrying all of that extra weight and now that I don't have it I'm having to relearn how to balance again - and wow are my abs weak! So this getting into shape thing is going to be difficult - but worth it. I felt much better (mood wise) after I went through the Yoga. Tomorrow it is on to my Wii Active.

In other news, I defend my specialized portfolio with my full committee next Friday. What does this mean? Well, if I pass then I can continue on in the program (ie prospectus and diss), if I don't pass then I'm done. So think positive thoughts that day. I'm getting really anxious about it - which in a way is kind of silly since it is really out of my hands at this point - but I find it hard to focus and get things done. If my bitchbarn crew was closer I'd say we need to have a "Get Macaela Drunk Night" and see what antics I would attempt while intoxicated. But since we are scattered, I will have to try something else instead. Suggestions? I should knit, but that would require me to sit in one place for longer than five minutes and I haven't been able to do that this past week - but I will attempt it again. Before when I was anxious I'd eat. It is a good thing there is no ice cream in the house. It is at these times that I miss pizza the most!!!! I have nutritionally designed chocolate candy I can have - but it is no substitute for a real piece of chocolate - and I'm not talking Hershey. If only I could buy single Ferraro Rochers at the grocery store.... Le sigh.